Rules For My Unborn Son .

334. Hold doors, pull out chairs, and easy on the swears.

335. If you're good at something, never do it for free.

328. Write down your dreams.
 
321. When it comes to opening presents, no one likes a good guesser.

318. Don't gloat. A good friend will do it for you.
 
317. Don't tip the owner. A handshake will do.
 
316. Don't stare directly into a dog's eyes.

290. Order dessert.

281. You aren't done raking until you've played in the leaf pile.

268. Watch your language at the ballgame.

187. Smile at pretty girls.

186. Have a favorite song. It doesn't have to be hip. (the best ones never are.)

146. Wear cowboy boots.

291. Hit first and hit hard.